"If God wills it."

There’s a saying in Jewish: אם ירצה ה
Basically, “If God wills it.”

This saying is probably the most loaded in Judaism when spoken to single Jewish women in the Orthodox community in the phrase “Soon by you.” Brides, married women, and anyone else really will say this to a Jewish single lady at a simcha, in shul, at the Shabbat table; you get the point.

I will loosely translate it as, “Soon by you. You’ll get married soon, if God wills it. And I’m sure He does. No, really, I’m sure there’s a plan for you in Heaven, you’re still young. And even if you weren’t, it would get sorted out eventually. This voice doesn’t mean pity, by the way. No, you won’t be 43 and living with three cats or your mother. Seriously. Is that a gray hair?”

I was rarely told, “Soon by you.” Probably because:
a. The person knew me and could recognize my mean stare.
b. The person could recognize my mean stare.

Well, at the wedding last night, the bride, a friend of my fiance’s, replied to my mazal tovs with, “Soon by you.” And, for the first time, I was cool with it. Because, yes, soon by me; whether I believe in destiny or God or not, I am getting married soon. It’s in the calendar, see?

I’m sure she meant it in the “If God wills it” context, but I chose to accept it as a gracious explanation of the obvious.






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