The Prime Minister makes a PowerPoint

It’s night three of my daughter’s cough and it’s gotten much better. I’m sitting uncomfortably on the Hello Kitty stool next to the crib, with my forefinger making lines in her palm, my phone on ‘play’ in the other hand, and in my left ear, an earbud is loosely holding on.

The prime minister is making a point.

It’s been there all along. The Americans have been briefed. Iran lied, in large Times New Roman font.

A curtain is removed, revealing mischief, and another curtain is removed, revealing added mischief.

Binders and discs of menace. 110,000 shards of threat.

Slide after slide, graphic after graphic. Warhead drawing. Embedded incriminating video. Shabab in Times New Roman. Project Amad in Times New Roman. I wonder who was responsible for cleaning up the slides before they went on stage. I wonder if they felt like I do before my work goes on stage.

On some level, above or behind or despite the Prime Minister’s choicest phrases, we’re all wondering the same thing: how the hell did the Mossad agents on this project get away with this? And which non-Jew will star in the leading role someday?

The theatrical prime minister is making a point. In the age of social media, all he needs is a 90s-era PowerPoint, tens of thousands of documents stolen and smuggled from Iran in one January night, and Times New Roman.

Times New Roman, the universal language in making a point.

And then it’s morning, and I’m walking my daughter to gan, she’s shying away from the big black dog that hangs around the area. Parents are mumbling half-thoughts to their kids. Gates are squeaking open. Car doors slam. The sky is cloudy, the branches on the trees are ever-so swaying.

And looking around me, I remember last nigh. Huh. Just as simple as Times New Roman. We put ourselves out there in Times New Roman.

The time Bibi addressed the UN General Assembly in his kindergarten voice.

Because Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu pretty much gave the world a deadline extension, and we’re probably going to have to bomb Iran enrichment facilities in April 2013 (wanna come for Pesach?) I’m going to skip the seriousness of the dire warmongering situation here at the UN General Assembly 2012 and instead enjoy some relaxing tweets and bomb diagrams.

And really, where would we all be if Bibi wasn’t around to show us how to draw red lines? Wherever we’ll be this time next year if, well, Bibi doesn’t show us how to draw red lines.

So I guess we shouldn’t be too surprised Bibi had to resort to his kindergarten teacher voice in order to explain. very. slowly. and. carefully. what. might. happen. if. Iran. ok, you get it.

Thank GOD @HarryR got a screenshot, because the RoadRunner bit happened so fast we all might have missed it:

And with that – LET THE MEMES BEGIN!

Real time conversation while watching – just before he pulls out the bomb chart:

I laughed out loud twice for this one (thanks @aseitzwald):

And @ZNovetsky gets a snort:

Coincedence that this tweet came out during the speech? (Or actually happened on this date during WWII, as the @RealTimeWWII twitter account goes?)

Speaking of, ouch. Fox considers itself a friend of Israel? (via @ZNovetsky again)

And then I finally figured it out…

Thankfully, @AviMayer shared the breaking news we had been sorta expecting:

And, a serious one, just because… it is serious.