everyday is monday when you're an office monkey.

oh my god.
an actual conversation i just had with my boss:

marc: any questions?
liz: no… but a man called from the taipei group asking about bringing 2 presents for the raffle at the convention. i wasnt sure what he meant, so i told him he should see ruth at the reception when he gets there.
marc: ok… you need to call him back and tell him to see ruth when he gets there…. ok?
liz: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHimnot5yearsoldHHHHHHHHHHHH

no one in my office LISTENS. its incredible. my boss thinks that no one can handle responsibility. he doesnt believe i’m capable of breathing by myself. then he leaves me alone with no assignments for a few days at a time because he is too busy doing everyone elses jobs because they can’t breath on their own either. all the co-workers have conflict issues. there’s a major need for conflict management here. the office has a resident asshole, who everyone hates but are too afraid to speak up bec he is the CEOs cousin and treats everyone in that mindset. even the boss doesnt bother him. and the boss is best friends, certainly closer, with the CEO. people are either obnoxious and pushing everyone around, or too timid to reply. the timid ones are also braindead. no one does any work and every directory published is failing. there is less money coming in every year. this is the black hole of business. i dont know why anyone still bothers to show up to work. i say, everyone go update your resumes because the company is going down. and everyone knows it too. i just wanna scream at everyone when i see this stuff: the gossip, backstabbing, lying, petty shit that happens in high schools.

and i love it how everyone comes to tell me about it because i’m the new neutral one. i wish i could just sit everyone down in the boardroom – that hasnt been used in years – and start conflict negotiations. i really think i wouldn’t need a degree for it. i’d even do it for free.

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