An *enlightening* discovery.

They say lightening never strikes twice, but that is simply untrue when it comes to the palms of Oren Zarif’s hands.

A while back I brought him up when I discovered the Mizrachi healer’s website.

Then, a couple weeks ago, I was walking through Talpiot when from the corner of my eye I spotted the signature lightening bolt and constipated look in the eye…

Oh no! He’s not posing for an advertisement for… a lighting store! And that’s not just a flash of lightening in his palms – it’s a flourescent lightbulb. What an electrifying way to make an extra buck on the side when the healing thing is not what it used to be.

But starting at nine shekel for a flourescent bulb. That’s not bad.

B’kitzur… Israeli advertising is scary.

So I’m going through my July edition of “בקיצור” (b’kitzur, in short)  which is a newsletter for yishuvim in the Matte Yehuda region. It’s packed with ads and superficial articles, but once in a while there is a gem – or two – that must be shared.

Take the following advertisement, for example. It’s a sale at Super Pharm, everyone’s favorite Walgreen’s attempt. It’s having a sale on its home brand products – three eyeliners for the price of one, various hair products for two shekel each… and then this:

Buy a box of condoms, but don't forget the bandaids!

‘Buy one get one free’ between first-aid gear and condoms. What kind of kinky sex do you think we’re having, Super Pharm?

Which leads to the second bizarre inappropriate ad in the bunch… Dancing is big in Israel, especially folk dancing. What a wonderful chug to send your kids to during the summer. You might want to consider this dance instructor:

Um... what kind of dancing do you teach, exactly?

On second thought, you might not. Her name is Pipi Nes. Go on, say that quickly. Drop one of the ‘p’s and say it again.