Me is bored.

I’ve been going through a bit of soul-searching lately; one begins to feel more responsible for one’s actions when constantly being watched by the cute, easily-influenced eyes of a littler one.

May I come clean for a moment?

I’ve been in Israel for almost five years. It’s an aliyah faux pas to actually admit at any point that you may be tired of, out of love with, or in my case, bored of Israel. And it’s not really living in Israel; it’s Israel itself. Let me clarify the distinction.

What is Israel? Not the country – the entity.

Is it a:

  1. Safe haven for Jews to get away from Western Antisemitism?
  2. Home of an army where a Jew can put on a uniform and fight for his own land as our grandparents never did?
  3. The magical land of humus and falafel culture (shared with Arab cultures and beyond)?
  4. A place with both historical Jewish significance and beautiful bikini-clad Jewesses?

I’m bored by it… Birthright ads. Debates about the ‘C’onflict. News from my alma mater about an anti-Israel speaker on campus.

I know it’s not fair; I’ve been exposed to it since I can remember, and others haven’t.

But I’m talking about me.

And me is bored.





4 responses to “Me is bored.”

  1. mother in israel Avatar

    You’re hanging out with the wrong people, honey. You’ve been here a long time, your situation has changed (i.e. motherhood)and it sounds like you’re no longer defining yourself an American immigrant. You’re Israeli, and you need to find out what you want to do here. With Israelis (who may also be English-speakers–I’m not suggesting you break off all ties with new immigrants.) What interests you now? Professional opportunities, studying (neither has to be formal), volunteer, creative outlets? Good luck!

  2. sara Avatar

    I hit that point at about 5 years, but I felt it as a relief, that I just “lived” here without a struggle or anything.

    I think there’s psychology writing on the stages of immigration – there’s the honeymoon, the disillusionment…dunno what else.

  3. elie Avatar

    Thanks for the perspectives… It’s nice knowing it’s all part of the process.

  4. Yosef Avatar

    I recently wrote, and decided not to publish, a blog post titles “Who Left the Milk and Honey out of the Cooler” or something along those lines.

    An immigrant is always an immigrant, and for some, that’s preferred to integrating into society. I look back at my old writing and wonder what caused the eternal Zionist that lived within me to flee. Perhaps we grew up, perhaps our responsibility to our families make us realize that Israel isn’t always perfect.

    No country is ever perfect, the US has a lot to offer in terms of raising kids, and in terms of lifestyle. Israel can offer some things that the US does not, but the *gaping holes* in standards of Education, and elements of social interactions of lack of respect (ok, I will stop) leave me petrified of raising our child here.

    I could go on but as I closed my eyes last night I promised today was going to be a good day, a positive day, and I was going to see everything with a blue and white tinge today.

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