i feel like you’re on a mission to collect a wife and a house and kids and a life but its your journey, not you and your girl’s – i feel like you walk around collecting things to put your life together – which isn’t necessarily wrong – but you need to be open to learning new things and letting your partner in life – if that’s what your looking for – give you just as much, tell you as much, teach you as much… you don’t know everything. and you can’t expect to just go around and collect a girl who has the same exact views as you and pick her up and carry her into your house like a puzzle piece and live your life.
all the rabbis i adore all say the same thing: without their wives, they’d be nothing. their wives teach them. they bring them new light. they inspire. you know what? i could be that wife, that woman, that inspiration for some guy. i will be. but i’m not gonna waste my time with someone who already knows everything they wish to know. or thinks they do. we’re so young and we know NOTHING. nothing. we’re still learning, even rabbi akiva was at 40.
but finding a life is not a collection, its not collecting all the pieces and putting together your pie. it’s figuring yourself out – searching for yourself – and as you try to find yourself, on that journey, you’re going to be finding it in the things you want, the things you’d be trying to collect – your wife, your job, your kids, your life. you will exist in those things. those things don’t exist because you found them. you exist because you found them.
god i wish my dad could hear that.